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A Positive Look at Polygyny

Arab News interviewed some women who took the polygyny option to solve particular, individual problems. “My first marriage didn’t work. After 18 years I finally decided to ask for divorce,” said Farida G. “I have three daughters from my first husband. A year after my divorce I remarried. My second husband is a good father to my daughters; he loves them, but he also longs to have his own biological children.”

 

She added that after giving birth to three children, she had her uterus removed. “So now I can’t bear children anymore. My husband was very sad about this, and things started falling apart. That’s when I decided that he should have another wife. It was my idea, and I myself searched for a bride for him.”

 

Um Aseel said she chose to remain married for the sake of her children. “When my husband started hinting that he wanted another wife, I confronted him straight away. I knew that it was becoming unavoidable; my husband had made up his mind.”

 

“I initially considered divorce, but then I thought about the children. I don’t want them growing up without either parent or feeling that their home had broken up. It was a hard decision, but my children mean the world to me, and I will always do what I feel is in their best interests.”

 

Yasmin is a third wife. After the death of her first husband she was left with six orphans and not enough income to care for them. “I married again and agreed to be a third wife. I do love my husband and love motivated me to marry him, along with the fact that I needed someone to financially support us.”

 

Zahra, 65, said that her 71-year-old husband is more active than her. She added that they do not share the same interests anymore and that they used to disagree on issues, something that motivated her to find another woman for him. “At my age I don’t want this headache. So, I encouraged him to marry another woman who could cater to his interests.”

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